Journal Entry 20: Letter From Margaret

I met Margaret in San Francisco at a Peace Corps event shortly before leaving for South Africa. She was easy to get to know, and not just because she makes some of the best pies this side of North Carolina.

5 months after I left for South Africa she left for Ukraine. As we’ve communicated over the past year, it’s been clear that, while we’re a hemisphere apart, we’re having similar experiences.

First, there are a lot of circumstantial similarities. We both live in a multicultural setting; we’re both in close proximity to the 1st world, and then there are our grandmothers who, it would seem, carry the country on their backs. …I just wonder if Margaret’s grandma laughs at her as much as mine laughs at me.

But there are also similarities that stem from us both doing the Peace Corps. I notice it most in the questions Volunteers end up asking ourselves. They start early. Upon arrival at our sites there’s the inevitable, "Now what?" Then, as you begin to understand that the Peace Corps is about helping people change their minds, you ask, "Can I do anything?" As you press up against challenge after challenges it's, "Do these people even want to change?" "Do these people even NEED me here?" "Am I making a difference?" "Am I wasting my time?" "Should I be making a difference?"

Personally, my favorite question is preceded by the revelation: "I’m in __________." And then, "…what the hell am I doing in __________?"

Maybe the best way to describe Peace Corps is like showing up for the first day of school with no one to show you around. There are no buildings, no student services and certainly, CERTAINLY no syllabus. Oh, and all the teachers - they’re hiding.

So off you go, and you have to figure out whom the teachers are, what they’re teaching and if the course their offering is right for you. It’s a lot of trial and error. A LOT of trial and error. Classes are picked up, dropped and, maybe, picked up again at a moment’s noticed.

The trick to this university, like at all schools, is understanding that you're a student first and teacher second.

But, back to my friend, Margaret. Here's an e-mail she sent sent to me not-so-long ago. I asked her if I could post it, because so many of the things she said echo my experience. I love how she end's the e-mail, in particular: "This is so not what I thought Peace Corps would be... and yet... " She's a hemisphere away but, Margaret, I'm right there with you. Well, except for the pink lipstick. I'm not quite there. ...yet!

Without further ado, here's Margaret:
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Hi there Eric,

So this will be short, as my babusya (grandma) is expecting me home soon. But I just, finally, read through some of your blog. It has been a while since I checked it, like basically since I came to Ukriane. And I keep wanting to write you a letter and honestly have no idea if you get mine, since the postal service here gets a big fat, sucky zero for reliability.

But, you know, for us PCVs life is interesting. I think about your experience versus mine a lot. I loved seeing your pictures and reading about your work. I am not surprised that you are a natural teacher. [Thanks, Margaret.]
As for me, work is fairly undefined. This may be good as it could allow me to be more of a free agent. Come the fall my primary job will be teaching healthy lifestyles, IT, and civics (ostensibly in Ukrainian), but I am also working with an orphanage and some other "community" organizations. It's all very confusing and summer time is a hard time to arrive at a site and expect to work. So I am trying to be patient and just "adapt".

Thankfully, I am living with a babusya who is a doll, except that she speaks really fast and sometimes crazy dialects. Part of the joys of being right next to - and I mean right next to - Europe are that the languages spoken here are very mixed and I hardly know what I'm listening to.
Also, babusya works really hard all the time: in the garden; with the chickens; in the kitchen; and sewing. When I have nothing to do - no work and am hanging at the house - I can't really help her because I don't know how to do the things she does, and she's not all that interested in showing me. So I just work in my room, read, whatever, and I feel lazy. So I'm not even enjoying my days off all that much.

But that will change as come September I will hopefully be taking care of myself again in my own apartment. I can't wait to bake her a fruit pie! They don't understand when I explain to them about our apple pies and such. So assuming my oven will work, I will be able to share that American thing which will be cool.

Anyhow... I have a lot to say, but am running out of time. Just wanted to drop you a hello. Things are good here. Some days they seem worse, one hour I'm like what am I doing here and then the next something really cool happens, like a student stops me in the street and says hello and asks me when we're going to have yoga classes again. (Oh yeah, somehow I seem to have become a yoga teacher here - kind of funny.) And I learned there’s a girls soccer team in the area, which I played with. I hope to connect with the coach and reach out to more girls in the region. Maybe we could organize a league or skills-camps next summer. But I have no idea. Ahhhh. This is all very strange and I do look forward to actually having a routine and a schedule come the school year. I am watching Buffy the vampire slayer on my computer obsessively as a former PCV left a huge book of DVDs, but Buffy is the only one that works. Like I said, my life, it’s very strange.

I have been contemplating buying some pink lipstick and wearing mascara so I can start looking as hoochy as all the women and girls here. This is so not what I thought Peace Corps would be... and yet...

Well, I hope you're well. Be in touch soon!

Margaret